Native English speaker, could you point out incorrect (or unnatural) points if any?
Question by jj_700: Native English speaker, could you point out incorrect (or unnatural) points if any?
Hi, I’m trying to improve my English. This is an excerpt that I came across in the movie magazine published in 1999 that had an English translation section for fan letters. It’s done by a language professional. I read it and felt something was wrong with it (English wise). Could you point that out if any? Thank you.
“Dear ABC,
Hello, I am a housewife who’s been married for 10 years. My name is DEF. I haven’t had the chance to go see movies since I have a small child to take care of. So I rented the “GHI” video as soon as it was released and finally saw it. I have never been moved so much. Even though many days have passed since I saw it, all the feelings never fade and still move me whenever I think of the movie.
To tell the truth, I never had any interest in you before. I just thought of you as a lucky boy blessed with a great chance. But as I got to know the way you think through the interview video, I felt that you had great understanding of your role and keen observation skills. I think you’re a born actor and someone who is capable of moving others. Please stay humble and keep on trying your best and make wonderful movies for us.
With love, DEF.”
Thank you for your comments.
1.”I haven’t had A CHANCE to go see movies since I …”
Is a “chance” used here proper?
2. “I HAVE never been moved so much. ”
Isn’t it “I HAD never been moved” instead of “I HAVE”?
One more question: did you feel the translator in the magazine was a native English speaker?
Thank you.
Best answer:
Answer by Rach
Usually, you don’t end a sentence with a preposition: “…small child to take care of.”
“I haven’t had a chance to go see movies since I take care of a small child.” Would be better.
Also, don’t usually start a proper sentence with SO. I’d omit that.
“……I never had any interest in you before.” Probably better said, “To tell the truth, I never noticed what a talented actor you are until now.”
“I just thought of you as a lucky boy blessed with a great chance.”
I just thought of you as a boy who happened to have good luck and fell upon a great opportunity.
“But as I got to know the way you think through the interview video, I felt that you had great understanding of your role and keen observation skills.”
As I watched the interview of you speaking about the character you played, I felt you were very in tune with your character’s personality.
“I think you’re a born actor and someone who is capable of moving others.”
I think you are a natural at acting and are capable of connecting with others’ emotions.
“Please stay humble and keep on trying your best and make wonderful movies for us.”
Keep up the good work and I look forward to watching more of your movies.
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