PLEASE Help Me Make Sense Of This?
Question by Amanda D: PLEASE Help Me Make Sense Of This?
ok so i’m 20 and i just had a baby girl, shes about 4 months old. now my bf/fiance do not live with each other. he lives about 80 mile away Round-trip, which is hard enough as it is. now he has a job and is saving up so he can support us and live together which i am proud of. the thing is its taking a toll on the baby and i. when he comes over she not familiar with him and he can never calm her down. its like she doesn’t know him and that upsets me and him. now he does come out as often as he can, on his days of ( like 2 a week). but the thing is there or some days where he will get off at 3 or 5 and he’ll go out with his friends. i don’t think that’s fair, and i understand that he is working hard for us. he says that its too much to come out here, that it would cost more to to come out here than to see a movie. but to me i think that the time spent with us is totally worth it. to me it seems like he doesn’t understand what i go through or what i can and cant do now that we have her. i’m the one who takes care of her, the one who has to make her stop crying, the one who gets up in the middle of the night; but yet he can do what ever he wants with no consequence (aka dealing with the baby) he doesnt have to deal with making sure that she has diapers and shes warm or if she happy, and when and if i go out i have to do all that. he has told me that if i wanted to go out that he would watch her but i think that right now he shouldnt be going out with his friends. he needs to spend as much time out here as he can and focus on trying to make a stronger bond with his daughter. dont get me wrong i dont have a problem with him hang’n with his friends; just once we get a place and things are more settled down and secure. idk what to do what to think or how to feel. i just get soo upset about this. PLEASE help me make some sense of this.
Best answer:
Answer by alexander w
.Amanda you’re frustrated by the repetitive,drudgery and loneliness of raising your daughter.You need a break but rearing a baby is time consuming,stressful and generally thankless.It would be beneficial if your partner could really make the effort for family bonding at least once a week. This would help everyone,the baby by knowing and touching her dad.Him by fulfilment,love and protection of his family.You by finding release from stress,worry and knowing he is there.You and the baby are priorities
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